I’m used to the questions the most popular simply being why? What would possess a person to regularly run in 100-mile events? This is a direct quote from an article that was written about me in my local paper a couple of years ago. My answer varies because really there is no one reason I do it. It depends on what is going on in my life at the time. I attempted my first to prove to myself that I could do it since then it’s been an outlet to release pure emotion of which I am full of at all times. Running never resolves any of the issues I may have but for the 20 or 30 hours I’m out on the course I live in a fantasyland. Everyone gets along and there are no problems and sadness and loneliness do not exist.

As I towed the start line in Huntsville State Park on Saturday I asked myself "okay Dave why this time"? "Why do you have to beat yourself up once again"? As I stood there I could feel a tear coming down my face. I realized the answer was because I don’t have anything else or anyone else in my life. It has been my own fault too because I’ve shut so many people out over the years. I’ve literally been running from the hurt and the pain that I felt in the past instead of taking a chance on life again. It wasn’t a real good time for me to be having these thoughts with the start just seconds away. I quickly regrouped and focused on my future instead of the past. I decided right then that I would work on making things better. I will work hard toward having someone in my life and I will open up and allow people in. Those thoughts inspired me and fired me up. I was now full of energy and excited to get on with the race.

There were close to 150 people clustered nervously by the start line as the race started in the dark at 6 a.m. sharp. A group of five of us led by Scott Eppleman started in the front. We were now off on the first of five 20-mile loops around the beautiful park. The course starts at the lodge on an asphalt road that quickly leads into a soft dirt trail going slightly uphill the first mile or so. It was a very nice morning with temperatures probably in the mid 40’s. Warm enough for shorts but I had tights wrapped around my waist just in case. I wore a long sleeve shirt with a tank top underneath for later in the day as I expected the temperatures to rise. I was also wearing gloves and had a knit cap stuffed in my pants. I never mind carrying extra clothing. The consequences are not worth the risk of not having it and it will not slow me any.

Anyway five of us jockeyed taking the lead for the first few miles in the dark. I took over after Scott strayed off the trail about a mile into the run. I didn’t feel comfortable up there because I tend to go out too fast. I slowed a little but no one behind me took the bait so I continued on. This is the fourth time I’ve run Rocky and the trail conditions never seem to change. The same spots are always wet and muddy every year. True to form we ran through a big mud puddle a couple of miles out. It was dark so I couldn’t tell exactly what I was running through or how big it was. What a way to start the morning off sloshing through the mud. I felt like a little kid and even wanted to stop for a second and just jump up and down in it. I knew though that there would be plenty more mud as we continued to run.

The part of the course I led the way on is about a mile and a half of single-track soft trail with a few roots here and there. It is virtually flat with lots of mud. I missed a turn about half way through this section and that allowed the person behind me to take over the lead. When I realized my mistake I turned quickly to my right not noticing there was a bridge. I tripped and banged my knee very hard on the wooden bridge and then fell into the ditch below. It wasn’t much of a drop to fall but my knee was hurt very bad. Some words my dad told me as a child just played over and over in my mind as I lay there for a few seconds. I played little league baseball and my dad always instructed me that if I were to ever be hit by a pitch that I should just jump right up, brush it off and run to my base. No lying around, faking, whining or crying. I wasn’t lying in that ditch but a few seconds and I was up hobbling again. The pain was pretty intense for about a mile, which concerned me. I can normally shake something like that off within a few minutes. I started worrying that it could be a factor late in the race if it starts to swell. It didn’t matter everyone before the end of the day was going to be in some kind of pain I was just feeling mine a bit earlier than everyone else. There was about another quarter mile of single-track trail before we hit the jeep road. The course split at this point. The 100-mile runners were instructed to go left down the jeep road and the runners competing in the 50-mile event were instructed to go right. It was well marked and a volunteer was there for the first loop so there was no confusion what so ever.

Still five of us up front but at this point no one in particular in the lead. The jeep road is very wide so some of us were running side by side. The road for the most part is very smooth with some ruts here and there but no rocks at all. The short rolling hills are almost unnoticeable the first time out but wear on you as you traverse them the 3rd, 4th, and final loop. It’s about a 1.5 mile run out on this section to the first aid station before turning around and running back the same 1.5 miles. As we went back we could now see the people behind us and as usual in ultras everyone kindly acknowledged each other by saying "great job, keep it up".

We continued past the part where the 50 and 100 mile runners split and at this point later in the race would be running with the people competing in the 50-mile event. There is about another quarter mile of jeep road before the course turns off to the right into the woods for another 2 mile section of single-track trail. The single track is generally the same throughout the course with soft terrain, some gentle uphills, lots of roots, and slop. Even though I’m running I always take the time to soak in the atmosphere. It’s very quiet and beautiful in the woods. There is the occasional short wooden bridge on this section that we run over which I think just adds to the beauty of the course. It’s very early in the morning so I expected to see some animals roaming through but to my disappointment never seen so much as a bird the entire day. Someone needs to tell me when the armadillos come out. In the four times I’ve run this race I’ve only seen and armadillo one time.

Still five of us leading through this 2 mile section we now are led down another wide jeep road. The road led us to the second aid station or about 7 miles into the race. A couple of guys blew through the aid station without stopping but my bottle was just about empty and I didn’t want to chance it. It only took a couple of seconds to fill and I was off again.

We were starting the second out and back and what I consider the hardest part of the course. It’s about 2.7 miles out to the third aid station and then return back to the aid station we just hit. I consider it hard for a few reasons. First and foremost it is the hilliest section of the course. Obviously since the elevation gain is minimal throughout the 100 miles there are no major climbs but there are several short hills that are hard to justify walking. Most of these hills are right here. Secondly there are 2 spots where you will definitely get your feet wet and if not careful could have your shoes sucked right off your feet from the mud. Lastly I question whether it’s only a 2.7 mile out because it certainly goes on forever. This is another one of these sections that is not hard the first and second time out but the next three become increasingly more difficult.

I noticed my right shoelace was untied as I made my way through this section. I ignored it because I stubbornly didn’t want to take the time to retie it. A few minutes later I noticed the other shoelace was now beginning to loosen. It wasn’t an uncomfortable feeling physically but it was driving me crazy mentally. I figured I could run with my shoes untied until I made it to the aid station.

My thoughts at this moment were kind of neutral. I couldn’t tell if we were going out too fast or not so I struck up a conversation with Scott Eppleman to see what he thought. He seemed genuinely concerned that the pace was too hot for him. It was kind of surprising to me because up to this point I didn’t feel as though I was pushing it at all. I had to respect his opinion though as a past champion of the race.

The only real worry I had at this point was the pain I was experiencing in my right knee from the fall I took earlier. I could feel it getting increasingly worse when I ran downhill. There wasn’t a lot I could do about it other than sucking it up and ignoring it. I was able to shake it off by thinking about seeing my friend who was running in the 50-mile race. I wasn’t sure at which point or if at all I would see her. She’s very fast so I knew there was a chance I might see her on the way back after turning around at the aid station.

I decided to stop for a few seconds to tie my shoelaces after reaching the aid station. When I did this I was left behind by just about everyone. One guy in particular, Jorge Pacheco, turned on the jets never to be caught up with by anyone again. I picked up the speed a little to catch up with Scott because I felt comfortable running by his side. I thought there was a chance I could learn something from him too. I always take the opportunity to learn from those who are more knowledgeable than I am. It wasn’t long before the 50-mile runners started coming by and sure enough there was my friend leading the female race through the first part of the course. She looked very focused and only slightly acknowledged me as she went by. I don’t know why but I felt a sense of disappointment that there wasn’t more interaction between the two of us. I mean I knew we couldn’t stand there and strike up a conversation but for some reason I thought there would be more. Maybe a high five or something. Well it was okay I just figured that she was trying to concentrate on her run.

Scott and I caught up with Paul Frost as we made it back 2.7 miles to the aid station. This aid station would always be hit twice because it was at the start of an out and back. So from here we made our way back down about a half-mile down a wide jeep road. The 3 of us made some small talk but for the most part just ran. The road ended and we were directed to our left down another single-track trail. The course remains single-track from this point on with varying terrain that include roots, mud, soft dirt, and some hard packed dirt. This could potentially be the hardest part of the course in the dark due to the amount of roots along the way. In the daylight they would be no trouble but at night they were very much a tripping hazard.

We ran about a mile when we came to the lake. We could see the lodge where the start/finish area was located on the other side. We were still about 6 miles from the end of the loop so this is just a tease. We ran in an open area along the lake for maybe 500 yards before entering the woods again.

When I run long distances I never think of the entire distance because it would just seem too overwhelming. I break it up into sections and run from point to point instead of start to finish. This part of the course is a good example of how I do that. There is a concrete bench at the beginning of the trail and one about a half mile to the end of it. It leads to my favorite part of the course, the swampy area where the alligators hang out. (at least in my mind) Anyhow the trail is again single track with lots of roots and flat for the most part with a few small uphills. In the daylight we could run fast and without abandon but in the dark it must be taken slower because of the roots. Paul, Scott, and I ran through this section fairly quick and without a problem. There was little or no talking between us. Normally quiet means someone is struggling but this early on it just meant we were concentrating. Just before the bridge the trail winds and twists several times. I could already feel my muscles straining to bend as I made the sharp lefts and rights around the trail. I thought to myself I need to incorporate some stretching into my workout regimen. My body is so rigid and only wants to stay in one place at a time. We made our last turn and in the distance I could see the opening where the swamp is. As we crossed the bridges a photographer snapped photos of each of us. I couldn’t help but think how brave he was for positioning himself off the bridge closer to the water. If indeed there were alligators there he would make a good meal.

The bridges lead to a short trail section where we turned right and ran until we reached two more long wooden bridges. The wood used to make the bridges is very forgiving and easy on the knees. I thought how I would love to run 100 miles on the bridges alone. The course again turns to the right after crossing the final bridge. It’s now about ¾ of a mile to the final aid station of the loop. This section is entirely in the woods on flat, single-track trail that at times is very muddy and wet. It wasn’t even worth the effort to try to keep try. I just plowed my way through the mud. It was actually kind of fun. This part of the course reminded me of the trail I train on in Delaware. We ran parallel to the big pond on the right but didn’t have much of a chance to enjoy its beauty because we had to concentrate on each footstep.

Scott, Paul and I were still together as we made our way into the aid station. Neither of us spent much time there before heading out for the last 3 miles or so. Leaving the aid station we traveled up a short incline before the trail leveled out. Most of the next mile and a half would take us through the woods twisting and turning a bit. Once again in the daylight it would be easy to follow but at night could cause some trouble for some people if they didn’t pay attention to the markings. A few years back John Geesler got lost here on his final loop causing him some unneeded stress and added time. I remembered that as I was made my way through staying especially alert to all the markings.

Andy Jones-Wilkins joined up with us for the last couple of miles into the finish of the first loop. I overheard him and Scott talking about Scott’s experiences on the U.S. 100K team this past year. That bit of eavesdropping kept me from having any bad thoughts of going out too fast or feeling the throbbing pain of my knee. We made our way up a short hill and turned right. We were now back on the same path we had started on earlier in the day. It was a straight shot for 1 mile on a dirt trail that runs parallel to the main park road back to the finish area. We finished the first loop in 2:42. Last year I did the first loop in 2:38 but the difference is this year I felt one hundred times better. I stopped to get some aspirin out of my drop bag and grab some food at the aid station. One of the volunteers looked at my knee and asked if I was okay. I looked at it for the first time and saw a little blood and a little swelling but just laughed it off and told him I was okay. In reality it was throbbing and had me somewhat concerned.

Now with 20 miles in the books I started back out for the second loop. My goal was to make it back in about 3 hours not feeling too drained. Last year after 40 miles my race was virtually over. It was no longer a race it was a death march to the finish. I did not want a repeat performance.

The 4 of us went out together but it wasn’t long before Andy and Paul both pulled away. Scott and I stayed together for awhile but somewhere during the loop I gained a slight advantage over him. We were never really close enough to have a conversation but I could always feel his presence.

As would be at the start of each loop from now on I would pass people returning from their loop as I went out to start my next. In a mile or so I would turn to the right away from the oncoming people. Here we go again through the muddy, single-track trails but this time with more mud because hundreds of people splashed their way through one time already. It would get increasingly worse with each loop.

I feel alone yet I know I’m not. My mind wanders off in the distance. I’m thinking about the miles ahead and it starts to overwhelm me. I think of how I have the difficult 5 mile, hilly out and back to do four more times. How I’m going to be out on the course at least 15 more hours. All these thoughts make me more aware of the pain in my knee. As soon as I identified what was happening I stopped immediately and replaced the bad thoughts with good ones. I thought of my future and people that I want to include in my life and that’s really what motivated me to get through this entire loop.

Up to this point there was nothing difficult other than maintaining my concentration. I knew what to expect since I already went around one time. The only difference is this time I will be running solo with no one to control my pace. I looked forward to seeing my friend again sometime during the second out and back. I calculated the time and figured we would probably meet at almost the same exact location. As I started out on the first out and back I saw the leader returning. He still had a bounce in his stride and looked very strong. I had no real visions of winning but if I did I think they would have been crushed here. It was still early but I know too much about Jorge to ever think he would quit or slow down. I can never tell exactly how someone feels inside though. I think I do a good job of masking pain. I normally try to remain expressionless no matter how I feel. I’m sure others do the same.

It was a matter of time and patience. Keep running forward at a good pace and the miles fly by. Eat, drink, and remain positive and there will be no pain. I trusted my training and experience to get me through but couldn’t help to let a doubt slip in once in a while. When I started getting close to the location I saw my friend the last time I kept my eyes open to make sure I wouldn’t miss her. It wasn’t much longer when in the distance I could see her coming towards me. As we passed I smiled and encouraged her and once again she gave me little response back. It didn’t affect me because I know it’s the way she has to run. It takes every ounce of concentration for her to compete in these events because of the severe asthma symptoms she experiences. I’m amazed all the time that she even competes.

Now that I saw her the second time it was back to satisfying my original goal of finishing this loop strong.

Back along the pond again I could see the start finish area which tells me I’m about 6 miles to the end of the loop. I maintain a steady pace as I cross the wooden bridges and head to the muddy flat section on my way to the final aid station. I’m excited as I enter the aid station because my energy level is still high.

I left the aid station making my way toward the entrance road of the park. When I reached the trail that runs parallel to the road I picked up the pace a little hoping to get in under 3 hours. I reached the start finish area in 5:44 meaning I ran the loop in 3:02. Close enough to 3 and I feel great so I’m satisfied and motivated to continue on. Before heading out though I again take 2 more aspirin to relieve the pain in my knee and grab some food and refill my bottle. This time I filled my bottle with Sprite instead of water. I left to start the 3rd loop followed closely by Scott Eppleman. He looked extremely strong and poised to make a move on the leader. We briefly talked as he went by. He recanted what he said earlier about the 1st loop being too hot of a pace for him. He was now going to run his own race. I thought about that for a second and used his words to my advantage. I didn’t try to keep up but instead decided to run my own race too.

We passed very few people coming back in as we were going out. The few people we did see I smiled at and offered encouragement to. Most were 50-mile runners whom I could distinguish because their race numbers were printed in red as opposed to the black numbers we had.

I was extremely happy to be starting the 3rd loop feeling so strong. I had no time goal in mind for the loop but once again wanted to finish strong. I figured if I was able to remain strong the entire loop the time would take care of itself. I was also motivated by the fact that I wanted to see my friend again for her 3rd and final loop. I had hopes of running the last few miles with her to see her finish. The only way I could do this is if I ran a hard pace through the out and back section. I figured that maybe she would either catch up with me if I was ahead or I may catch up to her. The odds of us meeting at the split where the 50-mile course and 100-mile course went in different directions were slim.

The goal was there but the energy level was dropping quickly. I remembered I had a couple of gels and two containers of this product called Rocket Shot in the pocket of my tights that I had wrapped around my waist. When I hit the out and back I drank the Rocket Shot and chased it with the Sprite in my bottle. The stuff seemed to work within minutes. I was all of the sudden running good and feeling good. I can’t say I sprinted through the out and back but I did run a consistent pace. The previous year at this point I did a walk run thing. I walked the short up hills and ran the flats and down hills. I had the energy to just keep going this year. I felt great coming back heading toward where I could meet my friend. No one was there but I knew there was a possibility we could see one another. I kept moving forward and looking to see who was ahead.

I finished the short trail section between the two jeep roads and headed for the second out and back. I didn’t think of it at the time but I guess I could have asked at the aid station if she had come through yet. That way at least I would have known if she was ahead of me or behind me. It became apparent as I closed in on the turn around of the second out and back that she was behind me and I would not have the opportunity to run with her to the finish. I turned and headed back wondering where she was. I finally saw her in almost the same spot as the other two times. She did not look good at all and didn’t respond to me at all. I knew her breathing was giving her problems. I worried a lot but I’ve seen her persevere through this before. There wasn’t a lot I could do since I knew if I tried to help she would not be happy with me so I continued on with worries still consuming me.

My energy level was still high and I got back through the tough out and back feeling good. I completed 50 miles in about 7:15 or so but knew there was a long way to go. Finishing 60 miles strong was important to me. I knew I could gut out the last 40 and still break 20 hours if I could run the entire 60 miles. I started to feel a little weak as I crossed the wooden bridges so I took some of the power gel I had stashed in my pants pocket. It was enough to get me through to the finish strong. I ran every step of the way thus far and as I drew closer to ending the final lap I became more determined to run as much as I could. I looked at the clock as my third loop came to an end and it read 9:02 so I ran the 3rd loop in a very satisfying 3:18.

When I reached the aid station I went through the same process as before of taking the aspirin, filling my bottle, and eating some food and this time I brought my flashlights along. It was just after 3 p.m. and the sun was expected to set at 6:15 p.m. so it would be close. I certainly did not want to get caught on the course in the dark without my lights.

Prepared and ready to go I ran out for the start of the 4th loop. I wondered if I would see my friend coming up out of the woods toward her 50-mile finish. In the distance I saw a female runner but it wasn’t my friend. I worried even more now to the point that I considered dropping out of the race to find out if she was okay. Had the asthma taken a toll on her? Was she laying somewhere in the woods with no one to help? I decided those thoughts were irrational because she knows how to take care of herself and I trusted her to do the right thing if need be. I turned right away from the on coming runners knowing I would not have the opportunity to see her and I would just have to let the worry pass.

It would be the same thing over again through the muddy single-track trail, to the out and back on the jeep road. I had the energy to make it to the out and back but could I run the entire thing without walking. That was a big question but it was something I wanted to do. I followed the same pattern as I did the third loop by drinking a bottle of Rocket Shot at the beginning of the out and back. It gave me the exact same effect and allowed me to power my way through the out and back easily. I was hoping that the pattern would hold true to form and get me through to the next aid station and the start of the second out and back or mile 67. I took another power gel to in between aid stations, which indeed gave me the added energy I needed.

It was still light as I reached the aid station and the start of the second out and back. Not sure how much I had left in the tank I thought potentially the sun could go down as I reached the next aid station at mile 70 so I prepared myself mentally for running in the dark. I was still strong though and it seemed the more uphills I ran the stronger I got. I reached mile 70 feeling great and turned around to make my way back. I was cautiously confidant and full of vigor. I say cautiously because I realized the tide could turn at the drop of a dime. Part of knowing how to run 100-mile races is knowing how to persevere through down times. I had yet to have a real down period through 70 miles so I was expecting something very soon.

When I reached 73 miles and the next aid station I went to my drop bag and found a can of Amp energy drink and gulped in down. I should say I chugged it down. It has to be the worst tasting stuff I’ve ever had but it has a tremendous effect on me. It was enough to get me moving toward the finish of the 4th loop. I had run 73 miles to this point without walking and now wanted to make it back to the start/finish area without walking at all. That would guarantee me a sub-19 hour finish. Those thoughts carried me for awhile and then I thought of something that my brother had told me before I left. He tells me all the time that I need to push myself harder. Don’t settle for less when you can have more. Give it your all and leave nothing on the table. That fired me up and gave me an adrenaline rush. I could never do what he suggests because my ultimate goal is to finish and if I give my all too early there’s a chance I may crash and burn. It was a good thought though and it helped.

I ran at a consistent pace through the rest of the loop and once again became excited as I reached the end of the loop. There was still some light as I reached the final mile but it was dark enough where I needed my flashlights. I passed several people on their way out and we each offered encouragement as we passed one another. I came in alone at a cumulative time of 12:35 for 80 miles or 3:33 for the loop. Definitely excited about the time for the loop. I figured that even if the worst happened like last year where I had to walk the entire last loop I’d still finish in 18:30 or so. I felt great for having just run 80 miles and was confident that I could run at least ¾ of the last loop.

I stopped at the aid station to take more aspirin, eat some food, fill the water bottle and change into my Delaware Cross Country Championship tee shirt. I wanted to finish the race with the name of my state on the front of my chest. It was a good feeling to be on the last loop but at the same time 20 miles is 20 miles and it was going to take some effort to run.

I left the aid station running but wasn’t sure exactly how much more running I could do without incorporating some walk breaks into my race. I thought of the out and backs and began to dread the 2nd one. Even though up to this point it hadn’t given me any trouble I’ve had problems with it in past races. If I were brought to a complete walk on this portion it would seem like it would go on forever. I squashed the thoughts and took it one step at a time. Every step I took would mean I was closer to the finish. I made it to the first out and back with the goal of running all the short rolling hills. This is where I completely died last year and had to walk the rest of the way in to the finish. I was in the top five at this point but watched as several people passed by me. I was determined to not let that happen again this year. Sheer determination allowed me to run the ups and downs.

When I reached the aid station I was starting to feel mentally weak. I was worried I might give in soon and walk. I didn’t want to give in because I just didn’t want a death march. Again I took it step by step and ran as much as I could. I finished the first out and back and the short trail to the second out and back. Along the way I passed a runner who was limping severely. I asked him if he was okay. He responded that his quads were killing him. I recommended that he get some food with salt or some how get some salt in his body and drink fluids. There was no way I could just run by the guy without helping him in some way. It made me feel good when later on I saw him again and he told me he was feeling better.

I could feel the bottom of my left foot burning as I ran through some mud puddles. A blister was forming and I needed to get to my drop bag so I could change my socks. When I got there and opened my bag I was disappointed to find I had forgot to put a change of socks in the bag. I had to settle for removing the old sock, cleaning the foot, putting moleskin over the blister and covering it up with duct tape. It wasn’t what I wanted but I didn’t have much of a choice.

I was tired when I left and since I stopped for a few minutes I started getting cold. I thought the shirt I was wearing on the outside was dry and would make me feel warmer if I removed all my shirts and put the dry one underneath. It was a good thought but it wasn’t true. All three shirts I was wearing were soaking wet. The only way I was going to survive the cold now was to get my butt running again. This was the first walking I had done all day through 87 miles and now I couldn’t stop or I’d freeze to death. Since I stopped my leg muscles tightened on me but the more I ran the better I felt. Problem was I could only maintain my running for a minute or two. It was more mental than physical and I knew that as long as I continued to move forward and run as much as possible I would regain some energy. I couldn’t allow this tough section to wear on me either. I had to get through it as quickly as possible and make my way to the finish. I ran some of the uphills and again they made me stronger and allowed me to run the downs. The downs were actually tougher on my quads than the ups. I fought my way to the end of the out and back and turned around one last final time to the finish. I was much stronger on the return home but still walked some.

The aid stations ran out of gel and I no longer had any so I was left to run on what energy I naturally had. It never turned into a bad situation because I was running more often than not. I figured the closer I got adrenaline would kick in and the more I would run. That wouldn’t be the case until the final mile, which I was determined to run.

Unbelievably I wasn’t all that excited about my finish. I thought I would cry or become emotional in some way like I normally do but it just didn’t happen this time. It seemed to be like a job more than an accomplishment. There was very little satisfaction. I crossed the line in 16:58:12 in 5th place overall. I just had an 11-minute PR, broke Mark Henderson’s old record of 17:11 for 40 year old males and none of that really mattered. I realized the void in my life could no longer be filled by running. It’s fun and I will never stop but it’s part of life it’s not life itself.

Dave Bursler
Bear, Delaware